Thursday, November 30, 2006

Ice, falls, cars and grumps

Yesterday I had another interview. I spent about 10 minutes attempting to put on pantyhose and finally got a pair on, only to have one leg twisted. I didnt have anymore pairs to dick about with, so I just left the pair twisted throughout my drive and interview. Pregnant women should NOT attempt to wear hose, I swear they really shouldn't unless you think its funny to watch and then I will just call you a Sadist and tell you to bite me.

The interview went fine. I don't know if you would call it good, bad or what - so I will say indifferent. I was 10 minuts late thanks to the crappy weather and the idiots who live here all their lives but have no fucking clue what it means to drive in snow/slush. So since its a job one hour away and I am now pregnant I will get the job. Of course, you knew that though right?

This morning my ass woke to drive the husband to work and the car won't start. No idea why, don't really care at the moment. The DH who is more like the 'big fucking ass who needs to shut up today' went ballistic on me, because this car is all my fault. He continued his fun torment the preggo by calling an hour later and asking me if I have it figured out yet and if he needed to find a ride home. My smart ass response was something like "that would be a good idea."

I called Roadside Assistance and waited on the tow truck. While deciding that they didn't need my CDs I walked out to the car and slipped on my ass, hard core using my right hand to brace myself. The tow truck came and now I am on the couch. I am in pain, I am worried about the fall and the bean sprout, I have no car, a bitch for a husband and wet pants. Oh and not to mention the fact that a job I want to apply for closes tomorrow and I needed to send the paperwork today by overnight and have no access to the post office.

Grrrr today sucks and I want my Ranger Candy!

Sunday, November 26, 2006

Rolling Fast Victory Today!

Good morning Starshines!

Today is my day for the RVF over at TankerBrothers. Ironically, when I first heard of this I volunteered to advertise since we were trying to get preggo. With the upcoming surgery I figured I would volunteer to fast as we weren't pregnant - and then well the rabbit died.

Today my spouse had kindly volunteered to pinch hit for me and the bean sprout since fasting is a no-no. Thank goodness the man can have coffee or a fasting preggo might actually be kinder to the world than the man without his coffee!

Go visit Tankerbrothers when you get a chance and say hello!

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Celtic Horoscope

You Are An Apple Tree

You are quiet and shy at times, but you have lots of charm and appeal.
You are quite attractive: your pleasant attitude, flirtatious smile, and adventurous spirit draw people in.
Sensitive and loyal in love, you want to love and be loved.
You are a faithful and tender partner - who is generous in sharing your many talents.
You love children, and you need an affectionate partner.

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Count your blessings

One year ago I was feeling sorry for myself while half drunk in a hotel in Cairo. Yes I know what horrible life I led, vacationing in Egypt during Thanksgiving. But I was sad because I was alone - I didn't get to share the experience with the hubby, I was missing him and decided to at least have a little fun with it. Here's my post from last year.

Thanksgiving Thoughts -

This is a little out of order but that's because I am still using a 35mm camera and have not gone digital yet. I need to wait for the billion photos to be developed.


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I drew this on hotel stationary in my room on Thanksgiving and emailed it from my phone to my hubby. I figured if he couldn't be with me I could at least let him know that I was thinking about him. I fashioned my turkey after the ones you used to make as a kid by tracing your hand and adding feet and the cockscomb. He called the day after I returned home and he mentioned that he got this...he thought it was cute and that he wants a new phone when he gets back so he can do goofy stuff like this.

I didn't take a photo before I sent it, but I also sent him a special present for Thanksgiving.....No they aren't nude photos but it was a tin with little leaves cut out in fall colours. I wrote out a bunch of reasons for why I am thankful for him. I also included a few from the dog for why she is thankful for him. It was an idea I borrowed from someone else and I think it went over well. He wants to try and do something like that back but he doesn't know how yet....he figured I didn't want a box of rocks since that's the most abundant supply of things other than sand.

....Saldy I happen to agree, no rocks but the sentiment is very nice.



I am very thankful to have my spouse home with me this year. I know next year I will either be very lucky and have him home again or he will be back in the sandbox. So this year, especially with the addition of the Bean means a hell of a lot to me.

Count your blessings & Be good to each other!

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Thank you and what's that smell?

I really do have a twisted sense of humor, for those I am about to offend (or think I am a stalker), please forgive me. When we did the math I realized the circumstances of the bean invasion had absolutely hilarious timing. Its really fucking funny, Seriously:

Hey Eddie...(ahem, excuse me) Dear Mr. Norton,

Thank you for being such a naughty little boy and wearing a goatee so well in the movie I watched the other night. The great sex dream of you that followed made me wake feeling pretty damn randy. Because of you, I jumped the hubby and to our great joy we're having a baby. I'll be sure to have a copy The Illusionist handy for our second child.

Forever Grateful,
Household6


------------------------------------------
I told you my humor is twisted, really twisted but hey the timing was funny as hell. On to the smell...

I have found my first repulsive smell - bacon. While out to dinner with the Inlaws we went to a local stake house-ish place in town. They are more like a Seattle Microbrew with a Hick-town flare (Please give me the city, I so miss the city).

I ordered a quesadilla and this place puts bacon on it. Just the thought of bacon made my stomach turn so I asked for it to be left off. They had a bad kitchen night, a new cook, what ever and it was left on. I could smell it before the damn plate left the server's hand. I cut into it, saw bacon and REALLY smelled the bacon and nearly gagged. My response was a total pregnant woman response (I waited tables through college and dealt with preggos myself), but I couldn't control myself, "Oh I said no bacon, this has bacon...take it back. Take it BACK!" I was brought a bacon-less one a few minutes later and ate my dinner.

As we crawled into bed at the end of the night, I roll over put my arms around the hubby and whisper into his ear, "You know that bacon in the freezer? If you cook it while I am in the house and pregnant, you will NEVER get laid again!"

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Hear Ye, Hear Ye

The rabbit died!

That is all.....

Monday, November 20, 2006

One if by land, two if by sea

Three if by flying fucking monkey. Ride Paul Revere, RIDE! The In-laws are coming the In-laws are coming!

I spent most of yesterday and this morning cleaning the house. Yes, I've become quite the Suzie Home Maker (shoot me now, I need a job). We went from a 1550 sq foot house in Germany to this little ity-bity shack of 1200 sq feet. So needless to say with a hairy dog, furballs are a plenty under the furniture.

I also spent time In-law proofing the home. Away went the pre-natal vitamins, HPTs, OPKs, baby books and infertility books. I am so tired of hearing cracks about how the dog is the only grandchild they are going to get, but apparently I am feeling Masochistic. I just don't want to deal with telling them that we are indeed trying for a kid but are having infertility issues.

I have to entertain them while the DH is at work on Wednessday and I SO look forward to that. I still wonder how their kid turned out so good when the woman honestly rides a flying monkey for a living?

Please call me often during this week, please? I will give out my number to anybody as long as they save me from this hell called In-laws.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

Peace, love, spit and coffee

I was over at YankeeMom and just read another story about Service Members getting the shaft while minding their own business. It really pisses me off to be honest and is no better than those that throw bottles at Gays walking around in the Castro. My Uncle Ronnie had to be picked up at 2am from the base he was at, through a back gate at the request of the military. Trying to pick up in the daytime was impossible for the protestors throwing rotten food, bottle, spitting and screaming about who or what my Uncle "killed" in Vietnam.

"I would do no less for family and he is a member of my family. I’m telling this story because it needs to be told. That there are kids coming home and getting treated just like the soldiers were 35 frickin’ years ago. And it really, really, and I mean really, doesn’t sit well with me at all!

And the wonderfully ironic part about all this is that the town I live in has been titled a “Hate Free Community”. The folks around here pride themselves on this “fact”. They “celebrate diversity” all over the place. They preach tolerance. They fight for the oppressed and downtroddens’ rights. ( the Palestinians are a favorite pet cause around here)

And they spit on our soldiers. Our soldiers who defend their right to do so.

I don’t see throwing coffee and spitting on someone and calling them a baby killer as Freedom of Speech and I never will. It’s beyond rude and it’s a despicable act. "

Read the whole story HERE.

Don't believe in the war, that's okay and is your right to do so. But please have a little common decency and respect and send your message to the right place - to the Whitehouse, not by spitting on a limping young man walking down the street in uniform.

Friday, November 17, 2006

Loss at Fort Leavenworth

Flags on Fort Leavenworth will be flown at half-staff on Friday, 17 November in honor of Colonel Thomas H. Felts, who was killed in Iraq on 14 November. COL Felts was assigned to Fort Leavenworth in the School of Advanced Military Studies. He had been in Iraq since January 2006 and was attached to 1-6 MITT, 2nd BCT, 1st Infantry Division. There will be a Memorial Service Friday, 17 November from 1100 to 1200 hours in the Main Post Chapel. COL Felts' family welcomes the Fort Leavenworth community, a reception will follow.

FROM THE FAMILY OF COL FELTS:
The family of Thomas H. Felts, Colonel, United States Army, would like to express their sincere thanks and gratitude to the many friends and loved ones who have shown so much support to them in their time of loss.

Colonel Felts dedicated his life to the service of God, family and country. He made a huge difference in the lives of all those he touched. He demonstrated that conviction by volunteering for the post in Iraq. He knew the dangers of being in harm's way. Yet, he remained committed to securing the future of our own children by defeating forces of hatred and violence and showing people what is possible if they embrace tolerance and peace. He laid down his life as he lived it, in the name of Love.

Colonel Felts' funeral and burial will be in Virginia. Please refrain from contacting the Fort Leavenworth residence and in lieu of flowers, the family requests contributions to Army Emergency Relief in order to help Soldiers and their family members.

I am part of the spouse assocation here and Col Felts wife was actively involved in the FLSC. I am saddend by her loss and my prayers go out to her and her family.

Godspeed Col Felts.

Rolling Victory date 26 Nov 06

Hey keep an eye out for me on the 26th. Even with the dreaded in-laws in town I will be participating in the The TankerBrothers Fast. Its a small sacrifice compared to what Service Members go through while serving down range but I am slowly becoming the little hippie I was growing up in the San Francisco Bay Area. Besides I can stand to lose a few more pounds!

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Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Life is rough

My doggie dear had a hard time at the groomer yesterday. With the in-laws coming, the every so smelly hundie needed to be made presentable. I left her for the whole day, giving her romp time in the day care center. When I returned at the end of the day I hear that I won't be charged for day care as she lasted 2 minutes before being taken out.

While speaking to the groomer about brushes for her undercoat the day care warden came in to tell me what happened. Apparently the little miss got there later than the rest of the swarm of doggies and missed the mutual butt sniff. She got cornered by a gang of 5 labs who all wanted to smell her who-ha as the same time and she freaked. According to the warden:

"Normally labs are just you know stupid dogs, but these ganged up and tried to smell her all at once. Unfortunately she became nervous and started biting the labs in an effort to get free."

I stare at my little 40lbs pup, and almost started laughing picturing this little waif biting the crap outta a gang of 90lbs labs running around the play yard doing an Over the Hedge "Plaaay? Play, Play, playyyyy!"

She came home and racked out on the couch, exhausted from her ordeal....

Dang it SARGE!

If Sgt Hook doesn't stop posting things that make me cry I swear I am going to have to pee on a stick and see if the rabbit dies....


REPORTING FROM THE FRONT

The sun beat like a hammer, not a cloud was in the sky.The mid-day air ran thick with dust; my throat was parched and dry.With microphone clutched tight in hand and cameraman in tow,I ducked beneath a fallen roof, surprised to hear “stay low.”

My eyes blinked several times before in shadow I could see,the figure stretched across the rubble, steps away from me.He wore a cloak of burlap strips, all shades of grey and brown,that hung in tatters till he seemed to melt into the ground.

He never turned his head or took his eye from off the scope,but pointed through the broken wall and down the rocky slope.“About eight hundred yards,” he said, his whispered words concise,“beneath the baggy jacket he is wearing a device.”

A chill ran up my spine despite the swelter of the heat,“You think he’s gonna set it off along the crowded street?”The sniper gave a weary sigh and said “I wouldn’t doubt it,”“unless there’s something this old gun and I can do about it.”

A thunderclap, a tongue of flame, the still abruptly shattered;while citizens that walked the street were just as quickly scattered.Till only one remained, a body crumpled on the ground,The threat to oh so many ended by a single round.

And yet the sniper had no cheer, no hint of any gloat,instead he pulled a logbook out and quietly he wrote.“Hey, I could put you on TV; that shot was quite a story!”But he surprised me once again — “I got no wish for glory.”

“Are you for real?” I asked in awe, “You don’t want fame or credit?”He looked at me with saddened eyes and said “you just don’t get it.”“You see that shot-up length of wall, the one without a door?before a mortar hit, it used to be a grocery store.”

“But don’t go thinking that to bomb a store is all that cruel,the rubble just across the street — it used to be a school.The little kids played soccer in the field out by the road,”His head hung low, “They never thought a car would just explode.”

“As bad as all this is though, it could be a whole lot worse,”He swallowed hard; the words came from his mouth just like a curse.“Today the fight’s on foreign land, on streets that aren’t my own,”“I’m here today ’cause if I fail, the next fight’s back at home.”

“And I won’t let my Safeway burn, my neighbors dead inside,don’t wanna get a call from school that says my daughter died;I pray that not a one of them will know the things I see,nor have the work of terrorists etched in their memory.”

“So you can keep your trophies and your fleeting bit of fame,I don’t care if I make the news, or if they speak my name.”He glanced toward the camera and his brow began to knot,“If you’re looking for a story, why not give this one a shot.”

“Just tell the truth of what you see, without the slant or spin;that most of us are OK and we’re coming home again.And why not tell our folks back home about the good we’ve done,how when they see Americans, the kids come at a run.”

You tell ‘em what it means to folks here just to speak their mind,without the fear that tyranny is just a step behind;Describe the desert miles they walk in their first chance to vote,or ask a soldier if he’s proud, I’m sure you’ll get a quote.”

He turned and slid the rifle in a drag bag thickly padded,then looked again with eyes of steel as quietly he added;“And maybe just remind the few, if ill of us they speak,that we are all that stands between the monsters and the weak.”

© Copyright January 25, 2006 by Michael Marks

Bogarded from Sgt Hook HERE

And check out this VIDEO! I love Nina Simone. 'Sinnerman' is in my opinion of her best songs, but what Sarge did with this classic song just made me bawl and bawl and bawl.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Man of the Year

As I have mentioned before, I am a little frustrated with current politics. The dems are trying to relive their Halcion days hanging out as far left as they are and the Repubs are so far right that I'm sure the collalition will be sending me to hell in a handbasket for thinking such thoughts.

I still wish that the parties wouldn't force their candidates to subvert their views in order to meet the platform of their party. It's like the Borgs from Star Trek - "You will be assimilated, resistance is futile." Once they get the party's nomination, their views must become that of the party as a whole. Unfortunately both parties are at such polar extremes that my voting often becomes one where I vote for the lesser of the two evils.

With my frustrations over politics growing,nothing hit home more this weekend than this movie.



Nothing made me cry or laugh harder than listening to the jokes Robin Williams delivered throughout this movie. Everything from the public debates, the advertising funding for the smear ads to homeland security was all up for grabs. All of the cracks and jokes he made ran true for me.

If you have a chance, rent it, go see it or buy it. If the current state of politics drives you as crazy as it does me - this really is a must.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

Thank You

To all who served or are serving, what else can I say?

Thank You

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Nothing New....

Nothing new to add....

* Ultrasound on Monday & found out a good friend is preggo herself

* Faxed paperwork for employment opportunities on Tuesday

* Cleaned house on Wednesday & terrorized the preggo woman with puke jokes and hormone overload remarks.

Still HATE the midwest like no frickin' tomorrow. That is all....

Monday, November 06, 2006

Speaking of old icons...

Does anyone know of or willing to part with the Voice Farm self-titled album on Ralph Records?

I had it a LONG time ago and someone snaked it from me. I even saw them in S.F. in high school...which has a funny story to go with it - my boyfriend's car got towed. I asked if we could call my dad - he got all independent on me and we took the bus to the impound yard. They wanted like $75 to release the car and there were no ATMs around and we were in the crappy part of the city. Finally I ignored him (the boyfriend) and asked the impound guy if I could call my dad on his phone. I did and my dad wanted to give a credit card but the impound guy couldn't take it over the phone. So at like 2 in the morning my dad drove into the city, found the impound yard and freed the boyfriend's car. I went home with my dad.

I really, really miss that album and it's been outta print for eons. I am really in a Voice Farm mood too.

Saturday, November 04, 2006

I need more coffee

Did anyone catch Prince Turki al-Faisal's (Saudi ambassador to the US) question and answer session from Monday? I caught a re-run of it this morning on C-SPAN. I missed the first few minutes, I think he was here for an energy council conference but I am not positive.

Anyways, while pulling out my materials to work on my midterm (my prof is a sadist and issued it Friday at 7pm and made it due Sunday at 7pm) I started listening to him speak. One question that he answered was on the state of Iraq, and what if any assistance they were providing the US and if he could speak about it some.

His answer was interesting to me, considering many majority Muslim nations are not fond of US involvement in the Middle East. I know Saudi Arabia has to try and balance between running their nation under the rules of Islam as well as meet the "rules of engagement" with the rest of the world. Tangent - sorry.

His initial statement was,"Since the United States came uninvited to Iraq, they must not leave uninvited." This is the thought process that I have had all along. Not so much the uninvited part, but more that we shouldn't leave Iraq a mess, but should leave when the Iraqi government is stable and able to ask us to leave, letting them run their country on their own.

The second part of the question al-Faisal was asked was in relation to a strategy I had not heard before (I could be under a rock but 'eh I heard it now). There is talk of separating Iraq into three different autonomous provinces or states. Prince al-Faisal said that in reality this was a poor idea. Because Iraq is not homogeneous, Sunnis are mixed with Shi'ite and Kurds it would be detrimental to the people. Prince al-Faisal feels that this form of separation would cause ethnic cleansing and the forcing of peoples to uproot their entire life, giving up all to move into their "settled" region. I think he brings up a good point, a really good one. In fact what comes to mind for me on this is the Jewish ghettos set up during WWII by the Nazis.

I know there is no simple, easy to implement plan to establish a stable government in Iraq, but we meaning the U.S. needs to stick it out, keep going and help the Iraqis to make it happen.

Friday, November 03, 2006

Midterm Elections & Ed Norton Returns

Hey did you vote yet? I did, yep via absentee ballot. I have voted in every election since I was 18 years old, even for the six years in Germany. I am a firm believer that you can't complain about your government if you don't bother to vote.

I am a little frustrated about the current party choices though. To be honest both parties seem to have their platforms set so far to the extreme end of their philosophy. You may agree with half of what they say and then the other half is so far out there. Last few elections I felt like I was voting for the lesser of the two evils instead of what I really wanted to be represented on.

A viable third party needs to come along and establish itself, just to show the current parties that extremisim isn't the way to go.

Oh and the other day the Norton wannabe emailed me a rejection notice on the position I applied for. It was a form letter and he didn't even bother to change the font so that my name matched the rest of the email. I knew I didn't have the job what like 5 weeks ago? So why was he just emailing me now?

So while trying to be the professional I composed a nice response. I thanked him for the opportunity of interviewing but needed at least one more sentence. I ask my husband and his response was:

"I hope you slip under a gas tanker on a pool of your own blood."

Okay since that wasn't going to work I called my friend (Can I call you my sister now?). Her first response was:

"May you be plagued by a herd of crotch eating camels that chase you through the desert."

I finally went with something along the lines should another vacancy come about to please keep me in mind. With family like them who needs enemies?

Thursday, November 02, 2006

You've got what?

Oh man I nearly peed my pants last night watching Grey's Anatomy! George was going off on the patient with two uteruses and it had me in stitches. He kept repeating "You have two uteruses?" over and over to just about anyone he could find. It was an all too familiar experience for me last December while trying to figure out what a spot was on my cervix.

That was just about the exact same response as my doc in Germany when he thought I had two uteruses. Just imagine a guy with his head between your legs, the chaperone just to the right, the drape, the lovely feeling of being in a vunerable state and him saying, "Oh THIS is so cool! It looks like there's a second opening, yeah. Really, I think there's a second opening. Oh man this is so cool, I think you have two uteruses!"

I am so glad I have a sense of humor or I might have beaned the man square on his head while he was jones-ing over the possibility of making the cover of the next month's JAMA. So seeing George last night running around jones-ing over the two uteruses case just had me laughing, poor patient and glad it wasn't me.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

*sob* It really happened

Ugh! It really happened, all the legal battles and bag of tricks in the end couldn't save a punk icon...CBGB's finally closed it's NYC doors for good.

"October 15, 2006 - It was the last night for seminal punk club CBGB, which is closing this week after a lengthy rent dispute ended with the building's owner, the nonprofit Bowery Residents' Committee, opting not to renew 76-year-old owner Hilly Kristal's lease.
The media folk were gunning for just the right shot — which they got when punk legend Patti Smith, CBGB's final performer, stepped outside into the crush to snap some Polaroids of the club's faded awning. The aged punks — who seemed to feel it was their right to be there even if they didn't have a ticket for the gig — wanted to be a part of rock and roll history and kiss one of the city's most beloved musical landmarks goodbye.

For most present, Smith's closing concert was about honoring the bastion of punk's fabled past, its lasting impact on a still-vital genre and all the bands whose careers the decrepit place helped to launch, including the Ramones, Blondie, Television and Talking Heads. American punk rock may not have been born here, but Kristal — who is battling lung cancer — certainly gave the genre its first big break.

Before she left the stage, Smith played a somber "Elegie," which concluded with a list of the many musicians who have died in the years since they'd played CBGB, including Joe Strummer, Johnny Thunders and Joey Ramone. The moment brought tears to her eyes, and many in the crowd paused to consider the gravity of the club's closing before they strode out the entrance for the very last time. Some tore mementos from the walls as they left." Article

Russ Turk from Glorious Noise says it best about the end -

"...I stumbled out of the club onto the Bowery, exhausted, hungry, thirsty, with throbbing feet, where hundreds of people were still outside waiting to get a glimpse of Patti and CBGBs before it was shut for good. I got a cab to go home, and said my last goodbye to another NYC landmark gone forever.

Goodbye CBGBs. Long live rock and roll. "


Hilly Kristal is supposedly moving as much of the place he can to Las Vegas, but that's the place of the "Rat Pack" not the Ramones - it just won't be the same.