Okay I am going over this ONCE, beyond that if you aren't able to understand then I guess that is your issue.
For a group of people who read every detail of my blog you aren't very astute. In fact you are pretty damn obtuse. As it says clearly in my "about me" section this is where I vent the slings and arrows of life. Journaling whether its private or a public venue like this is one of the simplest and most commonly used tools in psychology. It is a healthy form of releasing the negativity in a person's life. So if this blog is where I vent, then it is pretty much common sense that it probably WON'T contain only stories of puppies, rainbows and kittens. It is healthy, yes folks healthy for a person to journal frustrations on paper or virtual paper and then let go. It is unhealthy to hold onto those feelings, become overwhelmed and head down a path into destructive behaviors. THIS IS WHERE I RELEASE AND LET GO.
So get over it, just get over it. I'm not unhappy, I enjoy life and most of the people in it. I don't blame others, I often wonder about the common sense of others but don't blame them for my frustrations. But since you seem to think I do then from now on everything is Beth's fault. Easy fix, anything that goes wrong is because of Beth.
You can make any assumptions you want about my husband's job, his pay, my job, my pay - whatever. I don't give 100% of the details, I never have because I blog with a pseudo name. Let me assure you though that from before we were married (9 married) 12 years ago that we have always budgeted and lived off of his salary alone. We don't live outside our means, we don't overextend ourselves - we are too anal retentive to do that. So please rip me some more on the assumption that we don't know how to budget or can't live within our means. Just remember your assumption pretty much only makes an ass out of you since there's no 'me' in that word.
How or why a job offer came to me and why I accepted the job well its not public knowledge, that's a portion I didn't disclose. Would I have been happier had the offer come later say January - uh YEAH! Of course it would have been, but its not when it happened and its not how it played out. I'm working with what life presented me and attempting to make the best of that situation.
And as for the deployment and how evil I am for taking a job before he leaves, the bonding time etc. Lets use logic people is the husband home during the day? No he's not, he's not home during the day and can't bond with his son during the day because he's at work. Nights and weekends are the only times he's able to be with his son and he spends that time with Oz glued to his hip as he carries him around. So me taking a job during the day where the husband isn't home to bond with his son or us to bond as a family is just silly. We spend our time at night during the week with the 3 of us with about 30 minutes of TV to watch the news and then the rest is all Oz's time. The weekends include vacuuming, cleaning the toilets and kitchen and the rest is Oz' time. So sorry Beth but what's your point about taking a job before deployment? It has no effect on the situation.
So let me reiterate one more time that I vent on this blog. I write the negative out on virtual paper in order to let go of it. It is a constructive behavior, basic psych 101 so get over thinking that I am unhappy.
We live within our means, know how to budget and have always budgeted off of 1 salary since before we were married.
Bonding time with the family still happens people but while the husband is working he's not bonding with the baby now is he?
Now back to our regularly scheduled blogging.
6 comments:
HH6 - I dont think you need to defend yourself. Just my opinon, but as someone from outside, looking in (ie, I dont know you at all, think I linked to you awhile back from either AWTM or Heidi), you seem to "struggle" (I use that lightly, meaning that you are working to get to know Oz & what makes him content, etc) w/the same things I did when my girls were born as well as whether to work or not. Seems to me we have alot in common. At no time did I feel like it was my right to judge you.
Happy 9 weeks to Oz.
Keri
One of the things I have learned in the last 6 months of blogging is that I only reveal a portion of myself on the blog. Sounds like you do the same.
I really dislike that people have such a narrow view of their lives and feel that they must justify their decisions and positions by making you feel bad and judging you and your situation. All that stuff these people are throwing at you is their stuff not yours. It says much more about them than it does about you.
Only you know you, your family, your baby, your situation. Best I can tell you are a strong, independent woman who vents. What could be more normal or healthy than that?
I echo Butterfly Wife's thoughts. My kids were in daycare and I took Junior in today while I got things done. Horrors!
now THAT's telling them! none of us who blog tell it ALL! so, you enjoy Mr. Oz and his 9 weeks! and about the shots... I know, I hated it too! But tackling the nurse, is NOT a good idea, really! (I know someone who was close to doing that..)
LAW
Well said. It burns my butt when this crap starts. You have to do what is good for you. I have to do what is good for me. Nobody can make these decisions for you and nobody should judge what you do. About the shots, he'll cry, you'll cry, it's all good!
WHAT??? No puppies. Darn I've been reading and waiting for puppies for about a year now. I'm so disappointed. (yes I'm kidding I love your blog)
(((((Hugs))))) You're doing a great job. He's absolutely perfect.
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