Monday, September 24, 2007

Wait lists suck

So of course I am waitlisted for the CDC. I figured so much after talking to my friend yesterday. The "projected" wait is 2-4 months. Of course its not like any joesmoe is before me its single soldiers, dual military and single parent civilians. I understand that and won't complain about who's ahead but it does suck.

Also the second faclity I was recommended because someone worked there the last time they were stationed here and its the same owner and director has a waitlist of 29 people! So not looking good but of course I name dropped the lady that worked there in the hopes that it may squeeze me up the list a bit. (Yes I am shameless).

I've got two ladies to call for in home care. They are ladies from my coffee group and a church member. I'm on the fence because they don't have a license. One is in the process of getting a license though and "should" have her license within the next month or two.

I'm a little leary of FCC the in home version of the CDC since I sat there this morning in their office listening to a situation where the FCC provider's home (on post provider) was filthy, there was poison in the backyard because of a dog dispute and someone was trying to kill off a dog - basically a total mess. The second evil story I have of FCC providers was my friend in Germany who's provider was shut down because the husband was charged with molesting children. It apparently wasn't children in her care but he was charged and all the kids were questioned and immediately removed from the home.

So things are looking a little "eh" at the moment. I will find someone for the short term until either the CDC or the Wee Kids folks have space for my little man. I'm thinking I really do want to stick to a larger facility even if its a little institutional-ish, meaning not one on one care. At least I know the owners of one personally and the other is totally regulated by the Army and has to much visibility to screw up and not get beat up for it!


K and J said...

HH6, wherever you take Oz, call often and drop in unannounced at odd times. You get a VERY good idea of what is going on that way. :)

Anonymous said...

I know this will cause a stir and I'm sure the hatchet throwers are waiting in the wings, but I'm hoping you will reconsider, for the sake of your child, and decide to forgo your "career" for now and put your baby's life and well-being in front of your own wants. I was raised a feminista, got a college degree, had a civilian and then military career. But once those children came, I was delighted to walk away from it at least until the youngest started school. This world tells big lies to women. One lie is that if you give up your career, you'll be so far behind when you want to get back in the game. So Not True. My kids are grown now, I've been back in the workplace for many years. I didn't say any of this was easy, living off one income, etc. But knowing that my kids weren't raised by strangers (no matter how nice) and that they turned out to be responsible adults was sooooooo worth it. Not knowing you but having read your blog for a long time, my sense is that you are generally not a contented person. You will definitely not find contentment by warehousing your baby with strangers. We cannot expect strangers (no matter how good) to do for money what we, ourselves, won't do for love.

Heidi said...

I put my boy in FCC and was very happy. She only watched 2 babies and her 3 year old son. Both babies were born within 2 weeks. Just wanted to tell you . . . of course looking back I would give any thing to have those baby days back. Colin was so difficult as a baby (still is) . . . colic, cried for 8 weeks non-stop, formula issues, you know the drill the list goes on and on! Good Luck!

Anonymous said...

Well, I'm going to have to agree with Anonymous. As someone who is struggling with fertility as you did, I cannot imagine sending my child to day care within a few months of his birth. He needs you! I also agree that you never seem content and I think you really need to work on this. I know you don't care, but I'm telling you anyway. I so hoped that you would just relax and be happy once Oz was born.

I know how much you make and, with reasonable budgeting, you ccan easily live on one salary. I don't think what you're sacrificing--time with OZ--is worth what you're gaining.

One more note (and this is not meant to scare you, just to make you aware): The Vilseck CDC had an incident of child molestation this year. Two people in our unit were affected. The room had 2 teachers and several cameras and it STILL happened. Cameras are rarely monitored unless there is a concern/complaint and even whoever is watching it must search hours of tape. The installation was very effective in suppressing this information and it was never discussed in a public forum. My husband was aware of it via command channels since one of his soldier's children was involved, but he was ordered not to discuss it with anyone. Eventually people did involved did talk, but my husband only recently talked to be about it and that was after a PCS because the order he received was very strongly worded. All this is to say NOTHING is 100% safe and the best place for Oz, the majority of the time, is with you.

Household6 said...

Yeah more trolls! Yes, I'm calling you all anons trolls. If you don't leave a name, then don't bother leaving a comment.

As for lies women are told umm it all depends upon the field as to whether its easy to get back into. You also don't know my circumstance regarding government work.

Sorry Anon but you may have an idea what my husband makes based on general knowledge of a pay scale, but you don't know how long he's been in, if he's got prior enlisted service nor what job I'm doing nor how much I was offered to do. As for budgeting we've always lived on one salary - period. I work because I enjoy what I do.

As for contentment, I need to work on it? Huh? Okay who are you people and why are you reading if I am such a malcontent in the first frickin place?

Cole said...

OH MY GOODNESS...let the lashings begin. I will start with the fact that Anon raised her children then returned to work...bully for you! Some of us don't have the option, and those that do, have the right to make their own decision. I do hope that you allowed your children to learn that they could make decisions based on their own family needs, not yours.

I find it very funny that you have all these damn opinions, but don't bother to leave a name. That tells me that you are affraid of something. Is it that someone might actually call you to the mat on your beliefs?

As for living off one or two all can bite my arse! You don't get to make the decisions for someone else. If you have the opportunity to make the nest egg bigger and make sure that Oz has the best damn medical coverage possible...great. Not to mention if you can have the college fund taken care of now, so that when he older you can stay home with him during the homework years...go right the hell on.

You have all these great ideas. I am so happy that your children have not turned into the unibomber, but don't you dare come here and lurk then tell someone else how to do things...and if you do...back it up with your NAME!

As for Oz needing his Mommy...she is not jumping off a damn cliff...or anything like that. She is a quality mom no matter if she is there for those 8 hours a day or not. She is teaching her child that you have to look at the family as a whole and make the decisions, not hide.

HH6 you ROCK! You have done all the right things. Since we chat everyday, I know that. These others know nothing...I am sure I will get scathing replies...for the record, my name is Cole. If you tell me your blog site I can go visit it and see the perfection that is your life and either learn and thing or two or tell you how you are F@#$% up your life.

Bite me everyone of you mean spirited people that don't seem to understand others don't have to live life the way you did.

Hugs to that boy. Oz, knows that his family loves him!

K and J said...

HH6 I am so glad that Cole said that that. I didn't want to have to write a book but dang.

As a single mom, I didn't have the choice, but you know what, personally I am a BETTER mom because I work, because I can have an adult conversation then I can better concentrate on my son who as you know is MY WORLD! I consider myself a loving and giving mom who has sacrificed to give my child what he needs and more importantly what he deserves. I see those same things in you. Not every mom would worry about her child the way you do about Oz. They just show up, stick their kid in the baby bucket and off they go! Forget that the baby needs sunblock or maybe they should not be at the rated r film or maybe not at the concert with the loud music. But I SEE THESE FOOLS EVERYWHERE!!!!

As with everything, do what is best for you. We make our choices based on the best information we have at any given time. Period. If it works for you, then it works for you. Tell everyone else to SHOVE IT.

OH yeah, I have a NAME!

liberal army wife said...

Anon and Anon - either put up a name, or shut up. Excuse me, some families need to have both parents outside the home. and who the heck are YOU to tell anyone else how to parent!!! She is doing what she knows is best for the family she is part of. and no one else has the right to say diddly about it.

I'm glad you found a caregiver you trust and are willing to leave the baby with. YOUR happiness is important too, you cannot be unhappy and a happy mommy at the same time. YOU are doing what YOU need to do. Tell the others to pack sand.


Tracy said...

HH6~I want to show you a different side to stay-at-home moms.

I am leaving my name. I am not a troll. I have commented before :o)

I have chosen to stay home with my sons. That was MY choice. The choice I felt was the right one for MY family. Sacrifices were made, the budget belt was tightened beyond belief and I found work to do at home part-time. Now both kids are in school and I will be continuing to work my home job and substitute teach. I was a teacher before kids. Something "easy" to go back to after years off.

That is MY story for MY family. Should that be your story? I'm guessing not. Should I judge you b/c of the choices you have made or will make regarding your family? ABSOLUTELY NOT.

We moms have to start supporting each other. Blame and accusations get thrown both ways. I've been told I'm lazy and a bad mother b/c we don't have any money put aside for college yet (the boys are 8 and 5). No college money saved, but I made a choice regarding staying home with my kids b/c it was right for our family. We'll figure out college.

I get so frustrated with how moms can be. Every time I turn around it's an "us" vs. "them" argument: breastfeed vs. bottlefeed; work vs. stay home. etc etc.

wow. down off my soapbox now. All of that to say~only YOU know what is best for your family. You and hubby need to decide what is best for you two and Oz. The rest of the worlds opinions don't matter.

Household6 said...

Tracy, thank you for providing your prespective. And I applaud and respect you for making a choice that is what you felt was best for your family. SAHM's aren't lazy or dumb, it is their choice and should be respected.

If I could reach out and give you a hug I would.

keri said...

Why are the Anon's being anon. If you want to comment, at least leave your name. Being a mom, wife, etc is hard enough w/o being judged by people who dont really know your situation. The mommy war crap is infuriating. I work from home & have a sitter who watches my girls, but I applaud Tracy for her comments. Everyone has to do what is best for their own family.

Anon's BACK OFF. Unless you actually know HH6, (which I suspect you dont or why wouldnt you leave a name) SHUT UP